I swear, since the slowness of January was left behind, these past few months have whizzed by in a blink! How is it April already? At the rate time is going it will be summer before we know it!

March has been an interesting month for us. It was the month that our darling Ethan turned one and 

I’m not ashamed to admit that I have shed tears on more than one occasion as we approached that milestone. It still feels surreal now to think that I have a one year old who is not quite a baby any more but not yet a toddler either. He’s so close to walking but just needs the confidence to let go. He will happily walk holding your hand or using his walker but encourage him to let go and he’s reaching out for something to hold. We’ve had quite a few instances of him standing alone but usually it’s when he’s distracted and as soon as he notices he swiftly drops to his bottom.

While I was in no rush for him to crawl, I’m busting for him to start walking. Suddenly the world will become a much more exciting place. He can play out in the garden and we can chuck the sling in my bag instead of always bringing the pram out. I was never ready for him to reach any of his other milestones but he’s been crawling since October so it now feels like this next stage is within touching distance.

With March marking Ethan’s first birthday it seemed only right that this month I share a few family photos from his party. We had such a lovely day and he was truly spoiled by everyone – I know I have said it before but how is my baby boy one?

Roll on April, I'm looking forward to a trip home to Ireland to see the family and hopefully some sunny days out in the garden. Who knows... maybe next month I'll have photos of the little man walking to share with you.

ONE. One whole year, 12 months, 365 days since you were born and turned our lives upside down in the best way possible.

You were born in Harrogate Hospital at 2:51am on Monday 7^th March weighing an impressive 8lb 14oz after a long two day labour. I know it’s such a cliché but it’s true, where have the past 12 months gone?

I’ll admit I never got that first rush of love when you were born, if I’m honest I was just stunned, overwhelmed and exhausted but over this past year my love for you has grown by the day. Now I struggle to remember how we filled our time before you were born. We used to think we were busy but in reality we didn’t know the meaning of the word until I went back to work and suddenly we were juggling childcare, nursery runs, sickness, working long hours and keeping on top of things at home.

Speaking of work and nursery I went back to work on the 3^rd January after almost a year off with you my darling boy. So far you have settled in really well although you can be a little emotional when I arrive to pick you up. Daddy does drop off and assures me all is fine and the staff always say you have had a good day but I can’t help but worry about you. If I could I wouldn’t work but we both want to give you the best in life therefore we must send you to nursery. You seem to get a lot out of it and do things I would never think of doing at home especially the messy play! I feel so proud whenever we pick you up and a staff member hands me some crafting you have done. The Valentine’s Card in particular nearly reduced me to tears – “I toe-tally love you” with your little footprints on the front.

Thankfully I don’t work Fridays so we spend that day catching up with our mum and baby friends. It’s always a busy day but it’s important to see the people who we so special to us in that first year. I have noticed you can be a little clingy on Fridays especially when we are around other babies. I have wondered do you think it’s going to be like nursery and I’ll leave you but I won’t. You don’t need to worry little man, Mama will always be here and when I leave I will always come back.

You never were a great sleeper but thankfully now we seem to have more good nights than bad nights. Recently you have been going down around 6:30pm and we don’t hear a peep from you until 6:30/7am. Sometimes you waken once for a quick feed but we still count that as a good night. A bad night is 2/3 wakeups but thankfully these wakeups are becoming less and less. You also sleep so much better in your cot now. Gone are the days of co-sleeping, now you want to be left in your cot to sleep and spread out.

Foodwise you are doing really well. We are down to two breastfeeds a day now (and sometimes a night feed) with the plan to wean you off the boob in the coming weeks. I only ever set out to give you colostrum and then make it to six weeks so I’m feeling very proud that we have made it to one year. Unless you are poorly or your teeth are bothering you, you eat really well. There isn’t much you won’t eat (apart from greens) and oranges have to be your absolute favourite. We were in Aldi recently and you leant out of the trolley and grabbed a bag of oranges off the shelf – little monkey! I used to worry about how much solid food you were consuming and found myself comparing you to other babies but you got there in your own time. I do think nursery helped too as we have noticed your appetite has increased since you started. Oddly I never worried how much you ate when you were only breastfed but now I can see what you eat I do fret that you aren’t having enough.

You are also getting so much more mobile. You are so fast at crawling and can climb the stairs too so Daddy has had to install safety gates. You pull yourself up on everything, cruise around the furniture and love to use your walker but you have yet to take those first steps. You are so confident at walking provided you have something to push – you love pushing the kitchen chairs and your highchair around the kitchen but you won’t let go. On a few occasions you have stood for a few seconds but it has been when you were distracted. We were convinced you would be an early walker as you started crawling at the end of October but confidence is your issue. I know though you will get there in your own time, it’s just a question of when.

Oh Ethan, I could talk about you all day but I need to draw this letter to a close. You have brought so much joy to our lives, you have brought Daddy and I closer than we ever thought possible and we feel privileged to be your parents. We don’t always get it right but we do our best and I hope you know how loved you are. Happy 1^st Birthday Monkey. Thank-you for being ours, our beautiful blue eyed boy.

We love you to the moon and back

Mama and Daddy xxx
You can read Ethan's three, six and nine month letters here.

My little man turns one next week and I’m feeling very mixed about it. On one hand I’m excited but at the same time I’m feeling quite emotional. I’ve loved the baby days and part of me wishes they could last forever but at the same time I’m excited about the toddler years (apart from the terrible twos!) and to see what’s in store for our little family.

Last weekend in preparation for Ethan turning one I decided to do a little DIY cake smash. Now I am by no means as good photographer but I’m trying to teach myself how to use our big camera properly (and failing miserably at it) so this seemed like the perfect opportunity.

I toyed with what cake to use for a while and finally settled on a good old bundt. I didn’t want anything covered in a thick layer of icing and the shape allows for little hands to get stuck right in.

Unfortunately, Ethan was poorly over the weekend and even though this seemed to provide a fun distraction he got fed up after 10 minutes. I’m glad now we didn’t pay the £100+ for a professional one as that would have been a total waste of money.

Usually we don’t let him have any sweet treats so he kept looking at us as I snapped away as if to say “cake? I’m allow this? And chocolate?”

It was fun to see his reaction to the cake and being allowed to eat it although after a while he got bored and decided to pull the letters out of the lightbox instead – little monkey.

Thankfully he’s loads better now so let’s hope he has a great time at his birthday party at the weekend and enjoys having even more cake. I've decided to make him a chocolate dinosaur cake - how is my baby almost one?

Here are a few photos from our #bundtsmash!